Was it religion or duty that was considered more important than love? One must make sacrifices for their station sometimes, but affection is hardly unimportant.
I suppose you have made it to England, at least. I am sorry that your patron is not here to welcome you. I pray that those friends you have made and those you yet will can make up for that somewhat.
And you may find love yet. It often appears when we are unprepared.
Both, in a way. It is my father who decides my purpose, and love does not factor into the importance of my utility.
Being rather useless here is liberating, actually. I am able to engage in other pursuits — like research, and writing, and community of my choosing, rather than community chosen for me.
I am a little frightened of love that may come for me, as I fear what might become of me, should I come to need it more than the air I breathe. Reading that in stories and hearing of it from partners makes me want to first belong to myself, before I entwine my heart with another.
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no subject
I suppose you have made it to England, at least. I am sorry that your patron is not here to welcome you. I pray that those friends you have made and those you yet will can make up for that somewhat.
And you may find love yet. It often appears when we are unprepared.
no subject
Being rather useless here is liberating, actually. I am able to engage in other pursuits — like research, and writing, and community of my choosing, rather than community chosen for me.
I am a little frightened of love that may come for me, as I fear what might become of me, should I come to need it more than the air I breathe. Reading that in stories and hearing of it from partners makes me want to first belong to myself, before I entwine my heart with another.
no subject
I think that quite sensible! Knowing oneself is a noble pursuit.